Is it too early to talk about New Year’s Resolutions?

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I’ll answer that for you: yes. Yes, it is. Because the turkey hasn’t been eaten and the Terry’s Chocolate Orange has yet to be tapped and unwrapped* and the livingroom floor has yet to be strewn with wrapping paper (best reason ever to get a dog, by the way).

All that being said, a slight nod to a predicted New Year’s sporty spurt isn’t too much to ask for – and with the imminent arrival of seriously good workout gear at Aldi and Lidl, forearming my (three) readers is commendable, mais non?

In the fine tradition of the English language, I’ll work alphabetically: Aldi is launching its yoga and fitness range on January 2nd, with a wonderfully timed kitchen essentials range hitting stores on January 11th (for making healthy crap like kale chips and juices, you understand, not brownies or French toast). Faves from the yoga range include leggings (€10.99), yoga mats (€8.99) and foam rollers (€8.99).

In foodie terms, a Russsell Hobbs juice extractor (January 11th, remember) will set you back €49.99. Things to avoid include the kettlebells (January 2nd) – at 5kg and 7.5kg, these are baby kettlebells. Fine if you are, y’know, a child, or maybe if you weigh less than 9 stone, but anything above that and really, you can do better.

Aldi

Lidl’s playing catch-up with a January 5th launch date for what it’s calling “high-performance” sportswear and fitness equipment. They have loads of gimmicky things – exercise balls (I’m sure they’re great, but I’ve purchased about 13 in my life and never so much as blown them up), an “abdominal trainer wheel” (what?) and a “balance board” – but also some deadly things: a skipping rope (€9.99), perfect for exercising away from home; sports earphones (€3.99) and a sports vest two-pack (at a bargainous €5.99).

They’ve also kicked things up a notch (mild pun – acceptable?) with lovely sports bras (€7.99) and runners that wouldn’t look out of place in a designer collaboration (€14.99). I wouldn’t, y’know, run in them – because I have sensitive little feet with fallen arches and bunion rumblings and only run (twice a year) in super-supportive Asics – but I would defo give them a trip to the gym for a TRX class, or to lounge around on the cross-trainer gazing at the sporty Polish men.

Lidl

Diary dates: January 2nd (Aldi), January 5th (Lidl).

* Okay, full disclosure: I tapped and unwrapped my first last weekend. Because Christmas, like a new puppy, isn’t just for a day.

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